Pier One

This is on the different way people pronounce words, because of dialect, ignorance, or just a mouth that works that way. If a guy chews a lot of tobacco, he has to talk around it, so to the rest of us it sounds like he's lazy.

I'm not sure why some of this works, like if a big preacher with jowls and lots of self-importance says things like "The Lord gives us sussanance," the key word "sustenance" being slurred out lazily with a lot of familiarity. 

Usually it's some backwoods guy, like a guy I met in Arkansas, who said he had "bear" in his trailer. I said, "You've got a bear in your trailer?" "Yup, a whole case!"

Or how about this one, "I've been workin', I'm gonna take a shar."

Here's mine for the day, and this is the fictional guy who isn't afraid to get down and dirty: "Did your wife have a boyfriend before you met her?" "Nope, I was pier one."

Plus, he won't wear tight pants because of pier pressure.